


Start Again

by CarpeDiem



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: BAMF Ahsoka Tano, Fix-It, Gen, Obi-Wan Kenobi Needs a Hug, Post-Episode: s02e18 Shroud of Darkness, Time Travel, Time Travel Fix-It, Young Anakin Skywalker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-12
Updated: 2020-09-12
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:12:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 21,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26420164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CarpeDiem/pseuds/CarpeDiem
Summary: The Force sends Ahsoka back in time after she has realised that Darth Vader had once been her Skyguy (s02e18-Shroud of Darkness, knowledge about Star Wars Rebels is not required to read this story though). Ahsoka wakes up in the crèche, but in her 33-year-old body, a few days after Qui-Gon Jinn died on Naboo at the end of Episode 1. She decides to save Anakin and shows Master Yoda what will happen if the Jedi don’t realise that they have lost their way. Along the way Ahsoka lectures the Council like a group of younglings and teaches Obi-Wan something very important: Anakin Skywalker one-o-one.
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi & Ahsoka Tano, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker
Comments: 18
Kudos: 344





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to my beta lxsttimelady!

The first thing Ahsoka became aware of after slowly waking from a dreamless sleep, was that she was lying on her left side, legs pulled up close to her body and that she was feeling cold. The mattress under her was soft and her cheeks were resting on a thick pillow. With her right hand she pulled the thin blanket that was only covering her up to her waist further up her body and over her shoulders, but as she did, her feet and most of her naked legs became exposed to the cool air. The blanket had apparently become turned in her sleep. 

Slowly opening her eyes to the semi-darkness of the room, Ahsoka extended her legs, trying to turn the blanket around again and promptly bumped her toes on the bed frame. It brought her up short - why was the bed so small? - and she lifted her head to take a look at her surroundings. 

She recognised the room at once; the floral painting on the ceiling that was softly glowing in the dark, functioning also as a night light, was something she had spent hours marvelling at during her first year at the Jedi Temple. She was in the dormitory of the Clawmouse Clan in the crèche in her small bed and all around her were small bodies of children from different species sleeping peacefully. 

But that was not possible! 

Ahsoka sat up straight and blinked several times, but what she was seeing in the dim light stayed the same. She was in her first dormitory at the Jedi Temple, half-sitting on the bed that had once been hers. Next to her, the Mon Calamari girl, Karbini, was sleeping with a hand under her pillow and beside her, Ahsoka saw Viqui, a girl from Kuat with deep black hair and further down the row was the brown and black Wookiee boy, Jentuwr. 

The cool air of the night registered on Aksoka’s skin once again and she pulled the thin blue blanket in front of her body, only now noticing that she was completely naked. Gripping the blanket tighter in her hands, she tried to come up with an explanation for what she was seeing. The last thing she remembered was being in her cabin on her Corvette lying down on her bunk for a few hours of sleep before she wanted to fly to Chopper Base on Atollon to meet with Kanan and Ezra and join them on their quest to Malachor. 

And now she was sitting in her old bed in the crèche, but in her own grow-up body, surrounded by her childhood friends that looked no older than three or four standard years. Ahsoka was relatively certain that this wasn’t a dream, but she pinched her arm anyway just to make sure. It hurt exactly as it should so her first assessment had been right. 

Slowly, Ahsoka lowered her mental shields and a second later she was able to feel the calm minds of the children around her as well as the faintly pulsing presence of numerous Jedi in her vicinity. The Jedi were gone though. The Temple had become the Imperial Palace. And despite all of this, Ahsoka was here now and she could feel in the Force that this was real. She didn’t know how or why, but she would find out soon enough. 

Ahsoka swung her legs over the side of the bed and placed her bare feet on the floor. The floor was as warm as she remembered. Wrapping the thin blanket around her midsection, she stood up and walked down the row of small beds towards the door, cautious to be silent and not to wake one of her friends. Thinking that made Ahsoka shake her head, but she pushed that thought aside for the moment. When she reached the door it slid open soundlessly and she entered the common room where the younglings of the Clawmouse Clan ate together and spent their time between classes. It was dark in the room except for the lights of Coruscant’s air traffic high above that shone through the big windows. 

Ahsoka padded to one of the small terminals located on the wall next to the window. She sat down on the plush cushions and holding the blanket with one hand, Ahsoka activated the terminal with the other. The familiar interface greeted her and she had to blink several times against the bright light of the screen. Her gaze immediately wandered to the upper right corner though and when she saw the numbers there, she stopped breathing for a moment. The interface informed her of the time and date, but Ahsoka only saw the year: 7945 CRC.

It was impossible! In 7945 CRC Ahsoka had been 4 standard years old and she had been in the Jedi Temple for only close to one year! 

The last thing Ahsoka remembered was the year 7974 CRC, wherein she had been 33 standard years old. 

Ahsoka gripped the blanket between her fingers even tighter, while she tried to understand what was going on here. There had to be an explanation for all of this! 

She stood up again and walked to the door that led to the main corridor of the crèche. The door slid open and Ahsoka stepped outside. The floor here was cold under her bare feet and the lights on the walls lit up as they reacted to her presence. After a few steps however, Ahsoka stopped again. The door behind her slid closed with a faint sound, but Ahsoka just stared at the opposite wall. 

She had no idea what she should do now.

A moment later the sound of the lift doors at the end of the corridor to her left made Ahsoka turn around. At first, she thought the lift was empty, but then her gaze wandered lower and her eyes widened as she saw the small green figure that exited to lift. Master Yoda was clad in his usual cream coloured robes and his gimer stick made a clicking noise on the floor as he stepped out of the lift. The doors slipped closed behind him again and after he had only taken a few steps Master Yoda stopped. Resting both of his hands on his gimer stick he looked at Ahsoka with a contemplative expression on his face. He didn’t seem surprised to see her though and after a moment his ears twitched and he sighed, a sympathetic look entering his eyes. 

“Guided here by the Force I was. Your presence I have felt, Ahsoka Tano. Familiar, but different you are,” he said.

Ahsoka took a shaky breath and for a moment she wasn’t sure whether she was relieved that Master Yoda recognised her or terrified that this was real after all. And all of this left her with only one possible explanation.

“Master Yoda,” she said and had to take a deep breath before she was able to continue. “I think I travelled back in time.”


	2. Chapter 2

_“Master Yoda,” she said and had to take a deep breath before she was able to continue. “I think I travelled back in time.”_

The moment the words left Ahsoka’s mouth she was certain that this was what had happened, even though she could hardly believe it. 

Master Yoda’s ears twitched and he closed his eyes for a long moment. When he looked at Ahsoka again, he made a low acknowledging sound and nodded gravely. 

“Your time this is not, that I can feel. But here you are nonetheless. Therefore come with me, you should.”

Master Yoda made a gesture with his three-fingered hand that Ahsoka should follow him. Then he turned around and after the doors of the turbo lift had slid open again, he slowly walked inside. Turning around he patiently waited for her. 

Ahsoka remained standing in the corridor, the polished floor cold under her feet. After a moment she forced herself to start moving and follow Master Yoda inside the turbo lift. She turned around to face the doors as well and they slid closed in front of her before the turbo lift brought them upwards to the upper levels of the Temple. 

After the doors had opened again Master Yoda slowly walked out of the lift. Ahsoka followed him through the dimly lit corridors without registering where they were going. It was easy to follow Master Yoda and to just put her faith in him the way she had learned during her years in the crèche. Her thoughts were swirling inside her head though and by the time Master Yoda stopped in front of a door, Ahsoka had no idea where they were, nor if they had encountered anyone on their way through the Temple. There were quite a few nocturnal species represented in the Jedi Order but if one of those Jedi had passed them and seen Ahsoka, clad only in her small blanket and following the Grand Master through the Temple in the middle of the night, she hadn’t noticed. 

Master Yoda entered the room once the door had opened and Ahsoka realised that the old Master had brought her to his personal quarters. She followed him inside and Master Yoda made a gesture with his gimer stick in the direction of the three big round meditation cushions. They were placed in a triangle just like Ahsoka remembered from when she had been here during the Clone Wars. 

“Sit, please.”

Ahsoka crossed the room and sat down, keeping her sheet wrapped tightly around her. Master Yoda meanwhile walked to a white dresser next to one of the cushions, opened one of the drawers and took an enormous white and brown woollen blanket out of it. He brought it over and draped it around Ahsoka’s shoulders. 

Ahsoka smiled, pulling the blanket around herself. It was irregularly woven and looked coarse, but it was soft and warm. 

“Thank you.”

Master Yoda returned her smile and patted her knee through the blanket. 

“Arrange for clothes for you I will,” he said, before extending a hand and calling a datapad from the surface of a low gnarled table that was made of actual wood. 

Pad in hand Master Yoda climbed onto one of the meditation cushions across from Ahsoka. He placed his gimer stick next to him and began entering a few commands into the datapad. Then he put the pad aside again and folded his hands, before looking at Ahsoka. She remembered that look on the old Master’s face very well. It had appeared whenever one of the younglings had asked a seemingly trivial question and Master Yoda had taken his time pondering the question as if it was particularly interesting and deserved his whole contemplation as well as a meaningful answer. 

Ahsoka smiled ruefully and shrugged. She could guess what the question was, but she couldn’t help Master Yoda in finding the answer. “I don’t know how I got here or how this is even possible.”

Master Yoda made a contemplative sound and pursed his lips. “Mysterious are the ways of the Force.”

Ahsoka also remembered Master Yoda giving this very answer to numerous questions over the years and she had always been frustrated with it because it wasn’t an answer at all. This time however it was an answer - probably the only answer she would get to the question why she was here now and how she had gotten here and she didn’t know whether she should laugh or cry at that prospect. 

“Swirling around you the Force still is. A surge I have felt. Clear it was that something had happened. Investigating I went and in the crèche where Little Soka should have been, found you I did.”

Ahsoka smiled upon hearing the nickname Master Plo Koon had given her, because she hadn’t been able to correctly pronounce her name as a child. Once she had been able to say it correctly, the nickname had become a form of endearment, but that had been a long time ago and no one had called her by that nickname in years. 

Ahsoka took a deep breath and forced herself to focus on the present, no matter how bizarre it was. “What are we going to do now?” 

Master Yoda tilted his head. “Remember the future, do you?” he wanted to know and when Ahsoka nodded, he continued. “Change certain things you would want to?”

Ahsoka couldn’t have stifled the bitter laugh that escaped her throat even if she had tried. She remembered the Clone Wars, the fall of the Republic, the annihilation of the Jedi Order and the Alliance’s desperate fight against the Empire. Against Sidious and against Darth Vader who had once been her Master Anakin Skywalker.

“I would change all of it if I could,” Ahsoka answered and the moment she said it, she realised that she could indeed change the future. 

She was here before all of those horrible things she remembered had happened. It was 7945 CRC and even if the blockade on Naboo had already happened – she was a bit hazy on the correct date – and Palpatine had already been elected Chancellor, the Clone Wars wouldn’t start for another ten years. That was more than enough time to stop Palpatine and the war and to stop Anakin from falling to the Dark Side. Anakin - her Master, her Skyguy, the Chosen One. Who was only a 9-year-old boy right now. 

Suddenly Ahsoka had a strange feeling that this was the reason she was here. She looked at Master Yoda who was studying her intently and she tried coming up with a way to ask her question without giving away too much. 

“Has anything been happening on Naboo lately?” 

Ahsoka hoped that her wording had been vague enough, but there had been no need for being overly cautious because Master Yoda’s ears twitched and a curious expression appeared on his face.

“Yes, a blockade the Trade Federation had conducted on Naboo. Resolved the situation was after a new Chancellor had been elected and the Trade Federation’s attack had been stopped. On Naboo, I have been myself. Back here we arrived just two days ago.”

The feeling Ahsoka couldn’t quite describe grew and now she was certain why she was here. Naboo had been the beginning. Palpatine had probably planned his every move to destroy the Republic and the Jedi for years, but this was where it had started taking shape. This was also where Anakin’s journey had begun and where he had first attracted Palpatine’s attention. 

“I know why I’m here,” Ahsoka said and a smile appeared on her lips. “I’m here because of Anakin Skywalker. The Force brought me back here to protect the Chosen One.”

The tips of Master Yoda’s ears twitched and the look on his face become troublesome. “Powerful young Skywalker is. Bright in the Force he shines but unknown his future is. Darkness and great pain I can sense.”

Everything she remembered from her Quantum Physics classes – which was not all that much considering that Ahsoka had never paid close attention, it was all just theoretical after all - screamed at her not to reveal anything, because in doing so she could change the future. But the Force had brought her here to change the future, of that Ahsoka was certain now. Changing the future would mean that she could never go back though because the future she had come from would stop existing. But considering all the horrible things that had happened and all the people she had lost and presented with the possibility to change everything for the better, she didn’t want to go back. She would stay here and she would make sure that Anakin never became Darth Vader and that Sidious wouldn’t succeed in destroying everything Ahsoka held dear. 

“You’re right. There is potential for darkness in Anakin,“ Ahsoka answered. “But what you haven’t realised and what you failed to realise the last time as well, is that everyone will share his fate. If Anakin Skywalker falls, the Republic and the Jedi Order will fall with him.”

Master Yoda closed his eyes and took a heavy breath, before slowly shaking his head in deep sorrow. It pained Ahsoka greatly to see him like that and she hurried to continue.

“But none of this has to happen. We can change it. The Force created the Chosen One to bring balance and he ultimately did, but not in the way everyone had expected because the Sith haven’t been the ones responsible for unbalancing the Force in the first place. There has only been a handful of Sith since they were destroyed during the Jedi-Sith War, but there have been 10,000 Jedi. It all started a thousand years ago when the Sith formed their order and after destroying them, the remaining Jedi Order decided that being emotionless should be the ideal state for a Jedi. They were afraid of their emotions and strived to release them into the Force, the darker emotions as well as the positive ones, because both have the potential to become overwhelming. But no one is emotionless. There is always emotion and we must find our peace in the midst of it, but instead of restore balance, the Jedi started creating conflict and ultimately imbalance within themselves. I had a lot of time to think about the prophecy and the fall of the Jedi and I think there is another way to restore the balance. The Sith just made sure that the Chosen One never got the chance to fulfil the prophecy the way it had been meant to be fulfilled and in the end, balance was restored by the destruction of the Jedi.”

A long moment passed while Master Yoda regarded Ahsoka with an intense look in his eyes. “The destruction the Jedi brought upon themselves you think?”

Ahsoka didn’t evade Master Yoda’s gaze. She would have done so if she had still been a member of the Jedi Order, but when she had decided to leave because she had realised that the Jedi had lost their way, Ahsoka had also come to realise that even the old Grand Master was not all-knowing and certainly not infallible. 

“Yes, I think they did,” Ahsoka answered with a firm voice. “The Jedi should strive to maintain balance and reach an emotional equilibrium. I doubt that anyone can ever achieve a state where they are always at balance, but that has to be the goal. To be in balance with oneself. That's what it should mean to be a Jedi. Instead the Jedi distanced themselves from their emotions and stopped listening to the will of the Force in favour of what they interpreted as the will of the Force. On top of that, they became a tool of the Senate, fighters to do the Republics bidding and meanwhile, they forgot that they were supposed to be Guardians of the peace and that their duty was to all sentient beings in the Galaxy not just to those within the Republic.”

Master Yoda looked at Ahsoka with an unreadable expression on his face. She knew that he could feel her conviction in the Force around her. 

The moment was broken by the sound of the door announcing a visitor. Master Yoda didn’t move right away and another long moment passed, but then he sighed and climbed from his meditation cushion to walk to the door. He opened it and a droid was revealed outside, carrying a stack of clothes and a pair of boots in his arms.

“The clothes you requested, Master Yoda.”

Master Yoda thanked the droid and took the stack of clothes from him before closing the door. Then he brought the clothes over to Ahsoka. He had probably ordered them on his datapad earlier.

“For you those are. Change in the fresher you can.”

Master Yoda made a notion to the door across the room and Ahsoka smiled gratefully, before taking the clothes.

“Thank you,” she answered. Then she left the enormous white and brown blanket behind and went to the fresher. 

The clothes Master Yoda had ordered to be brought for her were standard Jedi garments: dark brown leggings, light brown boots, a brown undertunic and a cream coloured tunic with tabards and obi in the same colour. Ahsoka looked at the clothes for a long moment, but she couldn’t walk around barefoot and with a small blanket around her mid-section, so she put them on. They fit surprisingly well - even the boots. She had to remind herself that Master Yoda was 800 years old and he had had numerous Padawans during that time. That seemed to have enabled him to guess her size quite accurately. 

After Ahsoka had put the clothes on and closed her new boots she stood back up and looked at her reflection in the mirror. She had not worn the traditional Jedi Robes since she had passed her Initiate Trials. As a female in the Jedi Order, she had been allowed to choose her style of clothing from that day onwards and she had always opted for a Togrutan style of clothing even throughout the Clone Wars. 

When Ahsoka went back into the main room, she found Master Yoda sitting on his meditation cushion once again. He had closed his eyes, but when Ahsoka sat down across from him, he opened them again. 

“Much to think about you have given me. Very much indeed. Rare it is to get glimpses of the future, but the will of the Force I can fell this is. Meditate on this I will. Bring this before the Council we will have to.”

Ahsoka’s brows furrowed. It was one thing to reveal what had happened in her future to Master Yoda, but another to tell the Jedi High Council. She would have to be very careful which parts of the future she revealed and which parts would stay her secret, but if she wanted to change the future, she would need the Council to understand what was at stake. In her time the Jedi Council had suddenly found themselves in the middle of a war. Sidious had made sure that the Jedi would be the ones leading the Clone Army – the clones had allegedly been created by the Jedi after all – and the Jedi had been forced to act to save millions of lives. But if the members of this High Council could take a look at the decisions that they had been forced to make and the concessions they had agreed on the longer the war had continued, they would have no choice but to realise that they had already lost their way as Jedi. The Jedi had led a slave-army – because that’s essentially what Rex, Cody and the other clones had been – they had been fighting as Generals on the front lines of a Galaxy wide war and they had sent their Padawans into battle. The High Council would have to realise that something was fundamentally wrong within the Jedi Order if it could have come this far.

The Force had brought Ahsoka to this specific point in time, where Sidious had only just started to set things into motion. She had to changes things by making the Council aware of where their current path and the corruption within the Senate would lead the Jedi – to unimaginable pain and sorrow. There was only one problem and a bitter smile appeared on Ahsoka’s lips.

“It won’t be easy to make the Council believe me though.”

Master Yoda’s ears twitched. “Why do you think that?”

Ahsoka took a deep breath. “The Dathomirian Sith that was killed on Naboo, you were wondering whether it had been the Master or the Apprentice that had died that day.” Master Yoda nodded and Ahsoka continued. “His name was Darth Maul and he had been the Apprentice. The Master, Darth Sidious, is still alive and in the future I’m coming from he was the one responsible for the fall of the Republic and the fall of the Jedi. He planned all of it for years while hiding in plain sight and it was a masterful plan that worked exactly like he had intended because he made sure to have full control over everything. Darth Sidious’ name is Sheev Palpatine and he has just been elected as Chancellor of the Republic.”

Master Yoda looked at Ahsoka for a long moment, before slowly closing his eyes. The tips of his ears dropped downwards and he seemed to become incredibly small. The Grand Master of the Order was physically small, but he had always been full of wisdom and larger than life. Ahsoka had never seen him like that, not even during the war when there had been so much pain and grief saturating the Force. Now though it seemed that learning how blind even he had become was taking a heavy toll on him.

“Master Yoda,” Ahsoka said gently and the old Master opened his eyes, before looking at her with a tired expression on his face. Ahsoka had to swallow hard before she was able to continue. “It’s not too late yet. Palpatine may be Chancellor and there is corruption in the Senate, but he can still be stopped. There are good people in the Senate as well, people who believe in democracy with all their hearts and who would do anything to fight the injustice that has taken root within the Republic. Maybe the Jedi have lost their way during the last thousand years, but there is still time for a change.”

Ahsoka paused unsure of what else she could say to make Master Yoda see that there was still time to save the Republic and the Jedi Order and that they had to do everything they could in order to stop the future that Ahsoka had lived through from coming to pass again. After she had been accused of being responsible for the attack on the Temple and had stood trial before the High Council, Ahsoka hat lost her faith in them, but despite everything that had happened, she had never lost faith in Master Yoda. 

Taking a deep breath and opening herself to the Force, Ahsoka looked for guidance for what she was about to do. She only felt soft waves all around her in the Force, but no sense of dread or warning. Finally, she made her decision. 

“Let me show you,” she said, before sliding off the meditation cushion. Once she was kneeling next Master Yoda’s cushion on the floor, she extending her hands towards him.

Master Yoda watched her with an unreadable expression on his face, but after a moment he moved to the edge of his cushion, took Ahsoka’s hands in his three-fingered claws and closed his eyes. 

Ahsoka closed her eyes as well before dropping her shields until she could establish a connection to Master Yoda. As a youngling in the crèche, she had done that countless times and Master Yoda’s bright presence in the Force was familiar and comforting. Taking a deep breath, Ahsoka reached for her memories and showed Master Yoda the futures she had come from. 

It started with her life as an Initiate, the reports about Geonosis and the beginning of the war. Next came changes that happened in the Temple, the Clones, the attacks of the Separatists, the battles raging all over the galaxy, news reports staring the Hero with no Fear and the Negotiator saving the day, and finally Anakin Skywalker accepting Ahsoka as his Padawan at the age of fourteen. The horrors of the war followed, the constant fighting on so many front lines, the toll it took on all the Jedi and the deaths of so many – Clones, Masters, Knights and Padawans alike. Back at the Temple the tension within the Jedi increased constantly and finally culminated in the bombings, Ahsoka’s escape, her trial and ultimately her decision to leave the Order. Her journey afterwards took her to many different places and she saw the devastation in the Galaxy caused by the war from a new point of view. The next images showed Master Yoda Ahsoka’s alliance with Bo-Katan Kryze, her last meeting with Anakin, the newly appointed Commander Rex and the soldiers of the 501st that had painted their helmets in her colours. Then there was her fight against Maul and finally, the day that Rex and the others tried to kill her because the Chancellor had announced that the Jedi had betrayed the Republic. She had felt thousands of Jedi die during the Order 66 and she would never forget the pain and the anguish that had rippled through the Force. That day the Jedi Order and the Republic had fallen and the Galactic Empire had risen in their wake. Darkness had fallen over the Galaxy like a suffocating veil and Ahsoka had continued the fight with the few remaining people that still believed in the light. For a long time, she hadn’t known what had happened to her Master until the day she had been forced to face the truth that the Emperor’s Fist Darth Vader had once been Anakin Skywalker. 

Ahsoka broke the connection and opened her eyes, her fingers slipping from Master Yoda’s grasp. Something wet trailed down her cheeks and she needed a moment to realised that she was crying. She wiped the tears away and tried to centre herself to regain her composure. When she looked at Master Yoda again she saw a look of deep sorrow in his eyes and she could feel the Force saturated with grief and anguish swirling around him. Feeling that and seeing the expression on Master Yoda’s face, Ahsoka feared that she had made a terrible mistake, but then the old Master’s expression changed. He pressed his lips together and Ahsoka could see the determination in his eyes, just like she could feel it in the Force around him. 

“Blind we have become. Ignorant and too sure of ourselves. Continue this can no longer. The future you just showed me, come to pass again it will not.”

Master Yoda nodded grimly and Ahsoka felt tears well up in her eyes once more, as a smile spread across her lips. 

“Thank you,” she said softly and for the first time in many years, she could feel the hope that she had always desperately clung to.

A moment later Master Yoda’s expression became sorrowful once more and he shook his head slightly. “Listen to my Padawan I should have. Wiser than I am he had become, just like his own Padawan. Trying to warn their old Master the both have. Lost my Grand-Padawan I have, but ready to lose my Padawan as well I am not.”

Ahsoka looked at Master Yoda in confusion. She wasn’t sure what he was talking about, but it sounded like Count Dooku and Qui-Gon Jinn had both tried to talk to their Master in the past. Ahsoka didn’t know whether those conversations had been about the development of the Jedi Order concerning to the Senate or about the Jedi no longer following the will of the Force, but what she did know was that Count Dooku was already working with Darth Sidious at this point. She couldn’t imagine that his loyalties could be swayed, but then she had to think of Asajj Ventress and how she had turned her back on Sidious. If Ventress could do it, maybe Dooku would be able to do it as well. 

Master Yoda nodded again with a determined expression on his face and there was something final about that gesture. Then he looked at Ahsoka. “Here you will stay and rest. To the Room of a Thousand Fountains I will go and meditate. Tomorrow the Council I will summon and parts of the future that awaits us I will show them. Send someone to bring you to us afterwards, I will. Further proof your presence will provide. Believe you the members of the Council will have to. Sure of that I will make and listen to the Force the Jedi will once more.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What Master Yoda was talking about regarding his Grand Padawan: There is a comic from 2018 “Star Wars Age of Republic Qui-Gon Jinn #1” where Qui-Gon realises that the Jedi have lost their way and became fighters and are no longer guardians of the peace. Instead of striving to obtain balance, they strived to banish all emotions and thus created conflict even in themselves. He tries to tell Master Yoda about this, but Yoda doesn’t listen to him. If you haven’t read that comic already, I recommend you go and have a look at it! You can read pretty much all Star Wars comics at readcomiconline.to


	3. Chapter 3

Ahsoka opened her eyes when the door intercom of Master Yoda’s rooms chimed, alerting her to a visitor at the door that requested entrance. 

Master Yoda had not come back since he had left Ahsoka in his quarters in the middle of the night to seek communion with the Force in the Room of a Thousand Fountains. Ahsoka could understand why he went there to meditate. The garden was full of vibrant life and even though Master Yoda had always been more attuned to the Unifying Force, it seemed that what Ahsoka had shown him about the future she had come from, had woken the need in Master Yoda to listen more closely to the Living Force. 

Remaining alone in Master Yoda’s rooms in a time that was not her own and with the prospect of appearing in front of the Council the next morning, Ahsoka had been too keyed up to even think about sleeping. Instead, she had sat on the meditation cushion once again and done something she had not done in a very long time: sinking into deep meditation. During the fight against the Empire, she had never dared to give up her awareness to such a degree and therefore a light meditation was all she had allowed herself even in safe places. 

As Ahsoka now became aware of her surroundings again she realised that it was midmorning already. The sun shone through the open transparisteel window and the durasteel drapes and the Coruscant air traffic lines in the distance were as busy as always during that time of day. 

The door chime sounded once more and Ahsoka stood up and walked to the door, before activating the audio intercom system. The blue light on the other side would tell the visitor that the system was transmitting, even though Ahsoka decided to remain silent for the moment.

“Good morning,” a pleasantly deep female voice said. “I am Chief Healer Vokara Che. Master Yoda has sent me to perform a DNA test and escort you to the Council Chamber afterwards.”

Ahsoka knew Vokara Che and she had always liked her. The Twi’lek was the current Master of the Halls of Healing and even though she could be very strict and unrelenting with her patients - especially if those patients tried to release themselves from her care - she was a kind and amiable woman. Master Yoda seemed to have told her about Ahsoka appearing in the Temple as a full-grown adult and even though Ahsoka knew that Master Yoda didn’t doubt her identity - he had felt her in the Force - the Council would want to have a solid proof. 

Ahsoka opened the door and Healer Che in her long blue Jedi Robes, just a hue darker than her skin tone, entered the room. She smiled at Ahsoka, but she couldn’t quite mask the wary expression on her face. 

“I only need a quick blood sample, then we can go,” Healer Che said and pulled a small rot from the medical tablet computer she was holding in her hands.

Ahsoka extended her hand and Healer Che held Ahsoka’s index finger to the small device. With a soft sound, the device pricked Ahsoka’s finger and afterwards Healer Che inserted the small rot back into her tablet. She entered a few commands via the touchpad that Ahsoka couldn’t see and just a second later she looked up at Ahsoka again and smiled. 

“Alright, your identity is confirmed even though Force knows how the little Togrutan girl that I treated for a sprained ankle only last week may be standing in front of me closer to my age than that of my Padawan.”

Ahsoka didn’t know what to answer, but Healer Che didn’t seem to wait for a reply because she turned around and Ahsoka followed her out of Master Yoda’s quarters. Together they walked through the corridors of the Temple and on their way to the Council Chamber, they passed quite a few Jedi. The Knights and Masters greeted Healer Che warmly and the Padawans bowed, but no one took a particular interest in Ahsoka. There were thousands of Jedi in the Temple, Ahsoka reminded herself and her heart clenched as she remembered the day she had felt them die during the Order 66. 

Somewhere along the way, Healer Che’s steps faltered for a moment and when Ahsoka turned towards her, she saw the Twi’lek staring at the screen of her tablet with a surprised expression. Ahsoka wanted to ask what was going on, but Healer Che noticed her glance and smiled, mildly shaking her head and continued walking down the corridor. Ahsoka followed, a frown on her face. The test had confirmed her identity - not that she needed a conformation, Ahsoka knew who she was - but some other test the healer had been running seemed to have provided an unexpected result. 

Ahsoka was still thinking what it could have been that had surprised Healer Che when they reached the door to the Council Chamber. This new mystery didn’t help Ahsoka with her nervousness, just as meditating for several hours had not given her the sense of calmness she had hoped to achieve to face the High Council. 

Ahsoka and Healer Che waited in front of the doors to the Council Chamber for several minutes until the Temple Guards opened the doors for them. The big round room was bathed in the morning sunlight and as Ahsoka and Healer Che walked to the middle of the chamber, Ahsoka looked at the faces of the Council Members. She knew all of them of course, even though a few of them had not been part of the Council anymore by the time Ahsoka had become a Padawan. As costumery, Ahsoka and Healer Che stopped facing towards Master Windu as Master of the Order. But even though Master Windu was the elected head of the Order, everyone knew that it was Grand Master Yoda’s decision that held the real weight. 

Ahsoka bowed low just like Healer Che did and she tried not to let it show how nervous she was. She looked briefly to Master Yoda, but the old Master didn’t give her any indication as to how his meeting with the Council had gone so far, only his ears twitched slightly, but Ahsoka had no idea what to make of that.

“Please state your name for this Council,” Master Windu addressed Ahsoka and Ahsoka took a deep breath, before answering.

“Ahsoka Tano.”

Master Windu looked at Healer Che. “Can you confirm that?”

Healer Che nodded. “Yes. The DNA test has confirmed that she is Ahsoka Tano, the same Ahsoka Tano, that Master Plo Koon has brought to the Temple from Shili nearly one year ago. There are no signs of accelerated growth which means that her body has aged naturally to her current age of 33 standard years. There is an abnormality however.”

“And what would that be?” Master Ki-Adi-Mundi asked, looking at the Healer.

Healer Che took a deep breath, much like Ahsoka had previously done, before answering. “Her midi-chlorian count is higher than it was before. While it should be at eleven-thousand it is now at fifteen-thousand.”

Ahsoka turned her head and stared at the healer completely baffled. Now she knew why Healer Che’s steps had suddenly faltered on their way to the Council Chamber. A score of fifteen-thousand was higher than Obi-Wan’s, just shy under Master Windu’s and therefore very close to Master Yoda’s score. Besides that, the number of midi-chlorians was unique to a person and it shouldn’t be possible for them to change at all. 

A low rumble went through the Council. Just a short time ago they had been presented with a nine-year-old boy that had a midi-chlorian count of over twenty-thousand - the highest count ever registered - and now Ahsoka stood before them, older than she was supposed to be and with a midi-chlorian count increased by four-thousand points.

“That is not possible,” Master Windu finally said. 

“I know,” Healer Che answered. “I ran the test two more times after the first results came in. It is accurate. I have no explanation either.”

“Mysterious are the ways of the Force, hm?” Master Yoda said, letting his gaze wander over his fellow Council members with a complacent expression. He was enjoying that and Ahsoka had to stifle a grin. 

Master Windu looked decidedly not amused, before addressing Ahsoka again. “Master Yoda told us that he found you in the crèche in the early hours of today, where you had woken up in your bed in this body.”

Ahsoka nodded, serious once more. “That is correct.”

“He also said that you were sent here from the future. Do you have any idea how something like that could have happened?”

Ahsoka shook her head. “No, I have no explanation for this other than it was the will of the Force. I went to sleep yesterday on my ship in the year 7974 CRC and woke up here in the crèche just shortly before Master Yoda found me.”

“Do you have any proof that you were sent back in time?” Master Mundi asked. “Any knowledge that you could only have obtained in the future?”

Ahsoka assumed that at least Master Windu could sense that something was off with her Force signature just like Master Yoda had, but she could understand that the Council needed further proof than that. 

Ahsoka thought about that question for a moment and a smile came to her lips. “I could give you one of the access codes provided for members of the High Council.”

Several of the Council members raised their eyebrows and shot glances between each other. 

“You were a member of the Council?” Depa Billaba asked sceptically and Ahsoka would have taken offence at her tone, but she knew that Master Billaba’s scepticism was due to Ahsoka’s age. Master Windu had been the youngest Jedi ever to be appointed a member of the High Council and even though he had been a few years younger than Ahsoka at that time, he had been a huge exception. 

“No, I wasn’t,” she answered. “But my Grandmaster was, Obi-Wan Kenobi.”

“And he gave you his code?” Master Windu asked with a frown.

Technically Obi-Wan hadn’t given her the code, Skyguy had somehow gotten it from Obi-Wan and he had given it to Ahsoka to access certain parts of the library. But the Council didn’t need to know that, so Ahsoka put on her best Sabacc-player-face and just looked at Master Windu with a dry expression. 

“We were at war, Master Windu. It was necessary at that time. If I may?”

Master Windu nodded and Ahsoka sought his mind in the Force before telling him the code. Even though each Council member has their code, there was a universal part of the code that was always the same. 

Master Windu gave a nod to the other Council members that the code was correct. Ahsoka looked at their faces for a moment - at least at the faces of those Council members that she could see in front of her – to gauge their reaction. She wasn’t sure how much of her memories Master Yoda had shared with them, but after the DNA test had confirmed her identity, and increased midi-chlorian count on top of that and her ability to provide a correct access code for the High Council, they seemed to accept that the will of the Force had sent Ahsoka back in time. 

“You say that you were Obi-Wan Kenobi’s Grand-Padawan and therefore the Padawan of Anakin Skywalker, the boy we allowed to be trained by Kenobi only a few days ago and who Qui-Gon Jinn claimed is the Chosen One,” Master Saesee Tiin said and it was clear from his words that the Iktotchi Master did believe in her coming from the future, but not in Master Jinn’s assessment of Anakin Skywalker. 

“Anakin Skywalker is the Chosen One,” Ahsoka said and her tone made sure that every member of the High Council had to understand that this was an immutable fact. 

“Master Yoda showed us that in your future the Sith returned and infiltrated the very heart of the Republic, ultimately succeeding in destroying the Jedi. That means the Chosen One failed to fulfil the prophecy,” Master Yarael Poof stated and Ahsoka turned around to the Quermian Master with his long neck. 

“Anakin Skywalker did fulfil the prophecy,” Ahsoka answered with a hard look at Master Poof. “It was foretold that ‘a Chosen One shall come, born of no father, and through him will ultimate balance in the Force be restored’. You just assumed that this would mean the destruction of the Sith once and for all. But that’s not balancing. Balance can either be obtained if something rests in the middle of two sides, which would be the ideal state or if the two sides are represented in equal capacity. Imagine the Force as scales. The Jedi were the ones unbalancing the Force after destroying the Sith during the war a thousand years ago and by following a new interpretation of the code, instead of listening to the Force. The Chosen One was sent by the Force to restore balance and he was meant to do that one way or another. The Jedi failed to listen to the Chosen One so they did not manage to balance the scales and in the end, the Chosen One became the finale element that made the scales topple over and balance was restored by more drastic and destructive measures.”

Ahsoka held her head high, while she could feel the outrage of the Council members even through their mental shields. They were all accomplished Masters, strong in the Force and they were not used to the way Ahsoka had just spoken to them. Not even one of their own would dare to choose such blunt words and Ahsoka was not one of them. She wasn’t a member of the Council, nor a Master and not even a Knight and that made her words an audacity. But Ahsoka wasn’t a shy Padawan anymore. She had made her way and followed the will of the Force alone without the Jedi Order. She had been a Commander in a Galaxy wide war, had fought Sith Lords and had supported a fledgling Alliance against an oppressive Empire by building a very effective spy network from the shadows. She had lost her faith in the Council and most of her respect for its members years ago and she had no qualms to tell them that for all their knowledge and strength in the Force, they were wrong. 

What surprised Ahsoka though was that after a moment, when the individual feelings she could discern from the Council members became distinguishable, not everyone present had reacted to her accusations with outrage and outright objection. Apart from Master Yoda, Ahsoka could feel that Master Windu, Depa Billaba and Master Yaddle remained relatively calm and Ahsoka suspected that all of them had already entertained the notion that the Jedi Order had lost their way. The other members of the Council seemed to sense that as well because instead of accusing Ahsoka of having spoken in disrespect and blasphemy, they took a moment to look at each other in surprise. 

“The Jedi are rooted in the Light, guided by the Code as is the only true way,” Master Eeth Koth said after a moment of silence. 

Ahsoka turned around to look at the Zabrak Master and raised an eyebrow. “Are you so sure about that? The centre of the Jedi teachings for a thousand years has been to forsake all emotions.”

“Emotions and attachment can be a path to the dark side,” Master Tiin said.

Ahsoka nodded. “Yes, they can be, but they don’t have to be and most of the time they aren’t. The Jedi have plenty of attachments, even if they are not acknowledged. The whole Jedi Order is a big family and every Jedi has numerous sisters and brothers and mothers and fathers. Those attachments make us stronger and keep us in the light, but despite that we are told to release our emotions into the Force and not form attachments. If the simple act of caring and loving others is wrong though how can we sustain compassion? Let me ask you a question Masters: What is the opposite of love?”

“Hate,” Master Poof answered without thinking about it and he tried to continue, but Ahsoka shook her head and interrupted him before he could say anything else.

“No. Indifference.”

There was silence in the Council Chamber after that and even Master Poof seemed to be completely baffled by Ahsoka’s answer.

“The opposite of love is indifference,” Ahsoka repeated. “If we purge all emotions from our lives, that’s the state we reduce ourselves to, for nothing remains. We cannot feel love without hate, hope without despair or courage without fear. We are emotional beings and our emotions are part of us. Only through means of understanding and mastering our emotions we can obtain balance and follow the will of the Force. The Jedi were supposed to be the guardians of the peace but instead, they became warriors fighting for the Senate as well as fighting within themselves. Since the war against the Sith, the Jedi have been afraid of giving in to the Darkness and as a result, they tried to vanquish all emotions instead of realising that balance cannot be achieved through fighting against what you fear. It only creates conflict in ourselves and all conflict sows the seeds of the Dark Side. The Chosen One was supposed to balance the darkness the Jedi have brought upon themselves by guiding them back onto the right path. There is light and dark in Anakin, powerful emotions like love and hope but also sorrow and fear, just like in every one of us. But instead of questioning why the one chosen by the Force feels so deeply and has darkness as well as light inside of him, the Jedi taught him to release his emotions. He couldn’t because the Force was too strong in him and the attempt only created a conflict inside of him that tore him apart. And in the end, the darkness won and it swallowed the whole Galaxy.”

After Ahsoka had ended it was eerily quiet in the Council Chamber. She had spoken with a confidence that she couldn’t really explain herself, but that had come from deep inside of her. Her words had been full of passion, but she felt calm and centred. 

Several long moments passed and finally, Master Windu’s words ended the silence. “Thank you for appearing before the Council. Your words were heard and will be contemplated.”

Ahsoka recognised the words as the traditional answer to a formal plea brought before the Council. They gave nothing away though, just like Master Windu’s face didn’t. Ahsoka bowed deeply, hands clasped in front of her, before turning around and leaving the Council Chamber. Healer Che followed her and after they had entered the antechamber the guards closed the doors behind them. 

Ahsoka continued walking without really knowing where she was going until she heard Vokara Che’s voice behind her. 

“What you just did…”

Ahsoka noticed that the Healer was no longer walking beside her and she stopped, before turning around. Healer Che was looking at her with a strange expression on her face, full of wonder and puzzlement. Then the Twi’lek lowered her eyes and bowed before Ahsoka. 

Ahsoka didn’t know how to react to that so she just didn’t. A moment later there was a soft sound coming from the tablet Healer Che was still holing and she lifted it to look at the display. A smile appeared on her lips and she looked at Ahsoka again. 

“That was from Master Yoda. I should bring you to one of the guest chambers where you can rest and order something to eat.”

Ahsoka nodded and brought a smile to her lips. “Thank you.”

Healer Che smiled as well. “Come on,” she said and Ahsoka followed her to her turbolift.

It would probably take a while before the Council was done discussing what Ahsoka had just thrown at the collective heads. She only hoped that her words together with her memories of the future that Master Yoda had shown them would lead the High Council to question the path that the Jedi Order was following.


	4. Chapter 4

It was the second time in one day that Ahsoka found herself walking into the Council Chamber. This time however, there were only Master Yoda and Master Windu present and the setting sun on the horizon bathed the round room in an orange and reddish light. 

Ahsoka had anticipated that it would take considerably longer for the High Council to decide on how to deal with her forecast and her accusations - if they managed to reach so decision at all - and she wasn’t sure whether it was a good or a bad sign that she had been called to the highest tower of the Jedi Temple again on the evening of the same day. 

She had spent the day wandering through the Temple corridors and halls because no one had told her that she wasn’t allowed to leave the guest quarters that Healer Che had brought her to. Even though Ahsoka suspected that being escorted to the Council Chamber and back to the guest quarters had implied that she should remain there until further notice, feeling the Temple come alive around her by midday had been too much of a temptation for Ahsoka to care. So after checking that the Council was still in session, she had deemed it safe to wander around for a while. 

Walking through the hallways, past the training salles and teaching rooms she had had a hard time believing that all those Jedi she encountered had been killed during the Rise of the Empire and the years that had followed. Right now the Temple was bustling with life and it had felt so real that for the first time Ahsoka had realised that this was her reality now. However the Force had managed to bring her conscience back here and age her body, she was here now and there was no way back. She didn’t want to go back, not really, but she missed the people she had fought with side by side nevertheless. 

Ahsoka tried to push those thoughts away and concentrate on the moment instead. Master Yoda and Master Windu were sitting in their chairs next to each other and Ahsoka stopped in front of them, before giving a polite bow.

“Master Yoda, Master Windu. I assume the Council has come to a decision.” 

Master Yoda made a pleased sound and nodded. “Decided the Council has. Change there will be.”

“Your words this morning left quite an impression,” Master Windu added and looked at Ahsoka meaningfully. 

Master Yoda chuckled softly and his ears twitched. “Not used to being lectured the members of the High Council are. Content with being the ones that lecture others they have become, but too ignorant to see their faults and those of the Order when made aware of it they are not. Time it will take to change though. Deeply rooted our beliefs have become.” Master Yoda nodded thoughtfully. 

“The Republic and the Jedi have been living in times of relative peace for nearly a thousand years now,” Master Windu added. “We never saw the need to evaluate the path we have chosen after the Sith war. The future you showed us tested the Jedi in ways we could never have imagined and we have to face the fact that the Jedi Order was destroyed because we failed that test. You were brought back here by the Force to show us what will happen if we remain ignorant to the will of the Force and we would be fools not to recognise your presence here for what it is: a second chance.” Master Windu looked at Ahsoka with a grim expression on his face and Ahsoka could feel his determination in the Force around him.

“I’m glad to hear that,” Ahsoka replied and she truly was. But even though the Council was willing to seize the opportunity that the Force had given the Jedi by sending Ahsoka back in time, she knew that change was never an easy thing to accomplish, especially in the face of believes that had guided generations of Jedi for a thousand years. Only time would tell if this High Council was able to guide the Jedi Order onto a new path. 

Ahsoka’s reluctance to trust in the High Council must have shown on her face because Master Yoda looked at her curiously and the tips of his ears twitched upwards. 

“Not particularly convinced of the Council’s intentions you appear to be, mh?”

Ahsoka hesitated, but kept herself from averting her gaze. It has always been virtually impossible for her to conceal something from Master Yoda. She had entertained the notion that this would have changed over time, but the old Jedi Master could still read her emotions on her face just as easily as if she were still a youngling in the crèche.

“I do believe that your intentions to bring change to the Order are sincere, but I have lost my faith in the High Council a long time ago and even though it had not been the Council that I have faced today, I have seen the Masters entrusted with the fate of the Order make the wrong decisions over and over again.”

Ahsoka looked directly at Master Yoda and she saw the old Master pressing his lips together and nodding thoughtfully. It was Master Windu that answered Ahsoka after a moment.

“Then I hope you will conclude that the first decision the High Council made regarding the future of the Order was the right one,” he said. “We are offering you a seat at the Council.”

Ahsoka turned her head towards him and frowned, not being able to comprehend what she had just heard. “A seat at the High Council?” she asked baffled. “Are you serious?”

This could only be a joke, even though Master Windu was certainly not known to make jokes about something like this - if at all. True to his reputation he looked at Ahsoka completely unimpressed by her scepticism. 

Ahsoka tried to shake the surreal feeling she was having while doing her best to make sense of this offer. “Who is willing to resign from the Council?” she asked finally.

“It is Master Yaddle that would pass her seat on to you,” Master Windu answered. “She had already planned to retire from the Council at the end of this rotation and she believes that she can just as well do it right now and offer you the chance of succeeding her.”

Ahsoka remembered that Master Yaddle had indeed retired from the Council while Ahsoka had still been in the crèche, even though she couldn’t recall exactly when that had happened. She had been a mere youngling back then and the affairs of the High Council had been far away and not particularly important to her. For a moment she found herself seriously considering the Council’s offer, but it was simply too absurd. 

Ahsoka shook her head. “I’m not a Master though, I’m not even a Knight.”

Master Yoda raised an eyebrow. “Ready to become a Knight your Council deemed you to be when you were sixteen. Older you are now. Wiser you are. Mastered the Force and yourself you have and nothing less than that I can see looking at you through the Force. Honoured the Jedi Order would be to welcome you back in its ranks and honoured the High Council would be to have you as a member.”

Ahsoka didn’t know what to say because she simply didn’t know what answer she could give Master Yoda. She had felt honoured that her Council had thought her ready to be Knight back then, but they had been at war and a lot of Padawans had been knighted early to step in for the many Masters and Knights that had fallen in battle. Hearing Master Yoda say that she had achieved mastery of the Force all on her own after leaving the Order made her incredibly proud, especially because she had never thought of herself as wise or accomplished. But becoming a member of the Council was not a role she could imagine taking on and she felt that this was not the path that was meant for her. She thought about how to best decline the Council’s offer, but she took too long apparently. 

“It is the will of the Force that has brought you here,” Master Windu said, raising his eyebrows. “Why are you hesitating?”

Before Ahsoka could come up with a reply however, Master Yoda spoke. “More concerned with the fate of young Skywalker than the fate for the Jedi Order she is.” 

Master Yoda looked at her knowingly and Ahsoka bit her lip. He was right, she would not deny that. 

“Anakin is the Chosen One and I believe that I was sent back here to help him bring balance to the Force,” she said. “It was not coincident that I was sent back here to this specific time.”

Now Master Windu’s eyebrows rose even further upwards. “You wish to train the boy yourself instead of letting Kenobi be his master?”

“No,” Ahsoka said shaking her head. “Obi-Wan is Anakin’s master. That’s the way it has to be. I’m sure of that. The bond they will develop as Master and Padawan will be unique in its strength, but I think that Obi-Wan could use my help to be able to truly understand Anakin and the path that lies ahead of him.” 

Master Yoda looked at her intently. “Prepared to save Skywalker at the cost of the Order you would be?”

Ahsoka did want to save the Jedi Order, but saving Anakin was indeed more important to her. She hadn’t been a Jedi for a long time, but she had always followed the will of the Force and the Force told her that Anakin was the key.

“I’m honoured by the offer Master Yaddle and the Council made, but I’m not meant to be a member of the High Council,” she said finally. “The Force sent me here to help Anakin bring balance to the Force the way he was supposed to be. I can feel that. If you are looking for a Master to help the High Council determine a new path for the Jedi to follow, I suggest Master Djinn Altis. He left the Order a couple of years ago and where I come from he has followed a different path for many years and succeeded in training several apprentices. I met him and a few of his students during the war and they were remarkable. I’m sure he would agree to become a member of the High Council if you promise him that there will be change within the Order. His ship should be somewhere on Bespin.”

Master Yoda made a contemplative sound and after sharing a quick look with Master Windu he nodded. “Contact Master Altis and offer him a Council seat we will.”

Ahsoka smiled and she could feel that this was a good decision. “Besides, I would hardly be a good choice as a Council member with not being on Coruscant most of the time, because I think that Anakin should not be trained here at the Temple for the time being.”

Master Yoda’s ears twitched and Master Windu looked at her surprised.

“And why is that?” the Master of the Order asked, tilting his head.

Ahsoka looked at him and once again marveled at how the two wisest men at the Temple were able to be so ignorant.

“Because Anakin is nine standard years old and he has been a slave for all his life, he couldn’t be farther away from the Initiates that were raised at the Temple since they were Infants. They can’t understand him and training alongside them is just going to make it harder for Anakin to fit in. And just like the Initiates and Padawans have no idea how to deal with him, neither do the Masters training them. They are used to teaching children that have spent all their lives sheltered at the Temple. Anakin is quite different from that. I know what I’m talking about because I too was raised at the Order my whole life until I left and had to adapt to a life that followed entirely different rules. Anakin is a formidable mechanic and an exceptional pilot because of his connection to the Force and he will learn lightsaber combat in the nick of time, but he never had a formal education apart from his mother teaching him how to read, write and do basic calculations. He also is very emotional and that is his greatest strength. But if he is exclusively trained here at the Temple by Masters that will teach him according to the Jedi Code the way it is currently interpreted, then his emotions will be seen as a weakness. He has to learn how to deal with his emotional responses and not to push them aside because he is being told that a Jedi does not have those kinds of feelings.”

Ahsoka noticed the thoughtful look that appeared on Master Windu’s face after she had ended. He knew what Ahsoka was talking about because something very similar had happened to him as well. Ahsoka had heard stories about Master Windu having been angry and troubled as an Initiate. But he had been fortunate to catch the eye of the Neti Master T’ra Saa, who had shown Padawan Windu a way to balance the strong emotions inside of him. She had taught him well and in the end Knight Windu had mastered his emotions by creating the Vapaad. 

“Trained young Skywalker should be by you and Kenobi away from the Temple then?” Master Yoda said contemplating the idea and nodding pensively.

“Yes,” Ahsoka answered. “At least for the first one or two years until he has had the chance to catch up to the Initiates and Padawans his age and adapt to the life of a Jedi.”

Master Windu regarded her with a skeptic expression. “You think that he will catch up with his agemates in one or two years?”

Ahsoka allowed herself a small smile. “Yes. Anakin is the Chosen One. He is incredibly smart and he has an intuitive understanding of the Force that even most masters never obtain. I believe that he is supposed to teach the Jedi by letting them see the Jedi Order and the Galaxy through his eyes.”

Master Yoda made an approving sound and nodded. “Agree with you the Council does. Training young Skywalker away from the Temple you and Obi-Wan will be allowed to.”

Ahsoka tried containing her amused smile upon hearing Master Yoda make decisions in the name of the High Council and bowed slightly. “Thank you, Master Yoda.”

Master Yoda nodded again. “Oversee Skywalkers progress personally I will. Regular updates I expect as well as monthly visits to Coruscant.”

“Of course,” Ahsoka answered. It had never been her intention to distance Anakin from the Order entirely, just to allow him and Obi-Wan to find their footing without constantly having to worry about being criticized. Even though Anakin had no longer been Obi-Wan’s responsibility by the time Ahsoka became Anakin’s Padawan, every time Anakin had done something questionable or unconventional, Obi-Wan had been summoned to the Council to justify Anakin’s action and defend himself against the implication that he had been too young and too inexperienced when he had become Anakin’s Master. Ahsoka had always found this unfair towards Obi-Wan in particular and she had come to realize that it had put quite a strain on Obi-Wan’s and Anakin’s relationship. She hoped that without being constantly criticized Obi-Wan and Anakin would have an easier time finding their footing as Master and Padawan and Ahsoka would do the best she could to further help them.

“Have you already thought of a way to explain my sudden appearance to the rest of the Jedi Oder?” Ahsoka asked finally. 

“Mh,” Master Yoda answered thoughtfully. “An idea you have given me. Part of the truth we will tell them. Your name that was written down in the archives after arriving here, we will change. Trained by Master Djinn Altis Ahsoka Tano was and a vision from the Force you received that brought you to us. The rank of a Jedi Knight the Council will bestow on you, even though a Master you are by your own right.”

Master Yoda nodded firmly, his lips pursed and Ahsoka smiled before bowing slightly. She would have to remain vague about her time with Master Altis, but it sounded like a convincing story and she was sure that Master Altis would have no problem with it, even if he didn’t accept the seat at the High Council. 

Ahsoka could feel that their meeting was coming to an end after they had talked about her future in the Order and Anakin’s training. But there was one more thing that Ahsoka needed to know.

“What are you going to do about the Senate and Chancellor Palpatine?” she asked.

“A decision the Council has not yet made,” Master Yoda answered. “Powerful he must be to be able to hide from us the way you showed us. Carefully we will have to act. An accusation like that we cannot make without proof. And until that can be obtained, easier it is to deal with a foe that we can predict.”

Ahsoka didn’t like the idea of Palpatine remaining Chancellor of the Republic even for one more day, but Master Yoda was right. There was too much at stake to make rash decisions based on hatred and fear. Palpatine had only just started to gain the political influence he needed to put his plans into motion and it would take years for them to bear fruits. The war would not start for ten more years and Ahsoka wasn’t even sure if the Kaminoans had already started breeding the first Clones. If not it would happen sometime during this rotation. It would probably take a year or two until they had enough evidence to expose Palpatine and hopefully kill him. Until then they couldn’t risk alerting the Sith Lord that the Jedi Council knew about his plans. That meant the first few batches of Clones would be created and even though they had been slaves, born and trained for war all their lives, they had been Ahsoka’s friends and she missed them, especially Rex and Cody. Ahsoka suspected that Master Yoda would try to convince Dooku to change his allegiance once more and showing Dooku that Sidious would ultimately kill him, so that Anakin could take his place, would probably do the trick. All the while Anakin would be as far away from Palpatine as possible, Ahsoka would make sure of that. 

“We will inform you once we have settled on a course of action regarding the Chancellor,” Master Windu said. “And we will be grateful for any further insides you can provide. It has been a long day though and the fate of the galaxy should not be decided hastily.”

Ahsoka nodded and bowed, accepting the wisdom in Master Windu’s words. The Force had given the Jedi a second chance. With the knowledge, Ahsoka had provided they could alter the fate of the Jedi Order and the whole Galaxy and they needed to make sure to get it right this time. They would not get a third chance.


	5. Chapter 5

It was rather late in the evening when Ahsoka entered one of the training salles that were reserved for the Knights and Master of the Order. Due to the time, the whole training area was already mostly deserted and while walking across the gallery Ahsoka had only seen Master Fisto doing open hand katas in one of the spacious open areas below her. The room she had just entered was rather small in comparison, but the ceiling was still high enough to allow aerial moves and with the door closed it granted privacy for a Knight or Master to instruct their Padawan away from prying eyes.

In the soft blue light emanating from the panels in the walls, Ahsoka found the person she had been looking for: Obi-Wan Kenobi. The chambers Obi-Wan shared with Anakin had been empty and Ahsoka had only been able to find Obi-Wan here because she had been able to follow his Force signature. After spending so much time with her Grandmaster during the war she had become very familiar with how he felt in the Force and due to the need to find each other on the battlefield Ahsoka had quickly learned how to locate Obi-Wan even over greater distances. 

The man in front of her was doing lightsaber katas, fourth Form Ataru with his eyes closed. His movements were fluid and graceful and his blue lightsaber was twirling through the air swiftly and accurately. He felt like Obi-Wan Kenobi in the Force, even though his presence was saturated with grief and insecurity and there was something erratic in his movements that Ahsoka had never seen before in her Grandmaster. The reason for this was that this Obi-Wan Kenobi in front of her wasn’t yet a Master. He had just become a Knight mere days ago after his own Master had been killed by a Sith right in front of him and even though his Padawan braid had just been severed, he already had a Padawan of his own to take care of. On top of that Master Yoda had told him this afternoon that his future Grand-Padawan had been sent back in time by the Force after having fought in a galactic war, crossed lightsabers with Sith Lords and witnessed the fall of the Republic, the Jedi Order and the boy that had just become his Padawan. It was a lot to take in all at once and it was understandable that his feelings were bleeding through his shields. Obi-Wan had apparently decided that doing katas would help him process all of that better than meditating, but from the way he moved and the Force swirling restlessly around him it wasn’t working quite as he had intended. 

Obi-Wan turned around on his next move and opened his eyes while bringing his lightsaber downwards in a vertical strike. He noticed Ahsoka standing in the doorway and stopped his kata, before powering down his lightsaber. For a long moment he simply looked at her, then he folded his hands in front of his body and bowed.

“Knight Tano.”

Ahsoka stared at him, at his downcast eyes, his boyish face, and his still short-cropped Padawan haircut and she said the first thing that came to her mind.

“You should try growing a beard.” 

Obi-Wan’s brows furrowed and he looked at her with a bewildered expression in his face. 

Ahsoka shook her head and tried to explain. “Sorry, I’m sorry. It’s just that you look so incredibly young. I once asked my Grandmaster why he was so adamant about having a beard and he said he would look like a Padawan otherwise. I always thought he was exaggerating, but… well now I see that he wasn’t. I’m sorry, this is just so surreal. I mean Master Windu and Master Yoda look pretty much the same – but well I probably shouldn’t take Master Yoda as an example.”

Ahsoka finally stopped talking and she was aware that she had been rambling. Obi-Wan stared at her for another long moment, but then he huffed in amusement and the awkwardness in the room disappeared.

“No, probably not,” he answered, before shaking his head. “I can’t imagine what it must be like for you to be stranded in the past all of a sudden.”

“Don’t,” Ahsoka advised good-naturedly. “It has its perks, but it’s rather strange.”

Obi-Wan tried to give a serious nod, but he was still smiling. “Alright, then I won’t try imagining it.”

The expression on his face was so familiar, despite the beard missing and once again Ahsoka marveled at how young he looked. 

“Come on, let’s go back to my assigned quarters. I’m sure you have a lot of questions,” she finally proposed.

Obi-Wan snorted. “Just about a few hundred.”

Ahsoka could probably imagine what some of them were and it was most definitely better to have this conversation behind closed doors.

Obi-Wan clipped his lightsaber to his belt and followed Ahsoka through the training area and to the upper levels of the Temple where the guest quarters were located. 

Inside her quarters, Ahsoka went to the kitchenette and busied herself with making tea. Obi-Wan took a quick look around, before watching Ahsoka. He remained silent though, probably not wanting to appear too curious or impolite by starting to ask questions the moment they had entered. 

“Go ahead, ask away,” Ahsoka offered with an encouraging smile after setting the water to boil.

Obi-Wan hesitated for another moment, but then he shrugged. “Alright then. So you are from the future.”

Ahsoka nodded. “Yes. My mind was sent back here and the Force somehow aged my body to the age I had back where I came from; 33 standard years.”

Ahsoka took two cups from one of the cupboards while looking at Obi-Wan to gauge his reaction. She could see that he was believing her, especially since Master Yoda had told him about Ahsoka being from the future already, but nevertheless, he had a hard time wrapping his head around it. 

“You don’t know why you were sent back or how, but you suspect that it is somehow connected to Anakin,” Obi-Wan continued stating after a moment as if to make sure they were on the same page. 

Ahsoka nodded again. “That’s right. Anakin is the Chosen One. He will bring balance to the Force one way or another. I think I was sent back here to make sure that this balance will not be achieved by destroying the Jedi.”

Obi-Wan stared at her, pressing his lips together, before and a grim expression appeared on his face. “Because I failed and Anakin fell to the Dark Side.”

Ahsoka walked around the kitchen counter, the already boiling water forgotten and stepped in front of Obi-Wan. “Listen to me, Obi-Wan Kenobi. It was not your fault. The Sith were to blame and the war and the High Council and the Senate. You were the best Master Anakin could have ever hoped for, but you are just human yourself and you couldn’t protect him from the Order or the rest of the Galaxy all on your own, not while fighting a war you were doomed to lose from the very beginning.”

Obi-Wan closed his eyes and Ahsoka could see his Adam’s apple bob, while he swallowed hard. Then slowly he started shaking his head.

“I can’t do this,” he said barely loud enough for Asoka to hear. “I don’t know how to train a Padawan or how to be a Master. Just a week ago I was a Padawan myself and now my Master is dead and I miss him so much and I’m so angry that he left me and told me to train this boy and that I wasn’t strong enough to save him. I keep seeing him die in my dreams every night over and over again and every time I feel like suffocating when I wake up and I have absolutely no idea why I’m telling you all of this.”

Tears were glistening in Obi-Wan’s eyes and he bit his lip while running a shaking hand through his short-cropped hair. When he didn’t feel his Padawan braid at the end of it he made a broken sound and started turning away. Before he could hide his weakness from Ahsoka however, she stepped forward and pulled him into a tight hug. Obi-Wan went rigid at first, but then he sobbed and moved his arms around her, holding on for dear life. 

Ahsoka held him and her heart broke a little at the thought that in her time Obi-Wan had had to deal with all of this on his own. Ahsoka remembered that Master Obi-Wan had told her that as a Padawan he had been reprimanded by the Masters for being too angry and too emotional. After suddenly becoming a Master himself and having to train Anakin, despite the Council initially refusing him to be trained at all, Obi-Wan had tried to become the perfect Jedi Master, serene and calm and in control of his emotions to give no one even the slightest reason to doubt either him or Anakin. Right now though he was a fledgling knight, grieving for his dead Master and he had just been confronted with a future where everything he was dreading had come true. 

Ahsoka held Obi-Wan close and stroked his back in slow circles, until she felt Obi-Wan stiffen in front of her, probably realizing how much he had just allowed her to see. Ahsoka let go of him, but looked at him squarely and warningly held up one finger in front of him. 

“Oh no, you won’t. Don’t you dare to be embarrassed right now. Everyone needs someone else to lean onto once in a while and I’m sure Master Yoda has already told you that the Jedi Order is due for some changes because the Jedi have become too rigid on their interpretation of the Code during the last few centuries.”

Obi-Wan huffed softly. “Yeah, and I have no idea what to make of that either. I have always been told that emotions and attachments can lead to the Dark Side.”

“And they certainly can,” Ahsoka answered. “But think of it like this: If you drink a cup of tea and burn your lips, because the tea is too hot, the right conclusion isn’t to only drink cold tea. The lesson you should learn instead is to question why the tea was too hot and to be more careful to let it cool the next time you drink a cup of tea. In their fear of turning to the Dark Side the Jedi tried to vanquish all emotions instead of realizing that balance cannot be achieved through fighting against what you fear, but through a means beyond conflict, namely understanding and acceptance.”

Obi-Wan’s eyes widened in surprise and he stared at Ahsoka. She couldn’t quite understand why though. Sure, her words had not been in accordance with the Jedi teachings, but Obi-Wan looked at her like she had just told him that the younglings would be trained on Korriban from now on.

“What?” she asked bewildered.

Obi-Wan continued staring at her. “What you just said - balance but through a means beyond conflict. Master Qui-Gon used to say that. Those exact words.”

Now it was Ahsoka’s turn to stare at him in surprise. “Huh,” she said. “He used the same words?”

“He did,” Obi-Wan replied. “I remember one time when we had been on a planet near the Outer Rim, trying to negotiate a peace treaty between an indigenous hunter species and a group of settlers from a neighbouring moon. The settlers wanted to destroy the indigenous species because they had already attacked them once, but Qui-Gon said to me that fighting against something you fear is the wrong way. Peace and balance could only be obtained through a means beyond conflict. All violence sows seeds of the Dark Side.”

Ahsoka nodded and once again she was convinced that she would have liked her Great-Grandmaster - a lot.

“And by becoming the enforcers of the Republic, the Jedi began to follow the will of the Senate and no longer the will of the Force” she said. “They became tainted by the darkness without even realizing it, while at the same time turning their back to the light by vanquishing all emotions because they feared that they could lead to the Dark Side. They were supposed to be guardians of the peace, but instead, they became warriors, fighting for the Republic as well as fighting within themselves, slowly nurturing the Dark Side inside of them without even realizing it.”

Obi-Wan’s eyes were downcast, his brows knitted tightly and he looked deeply troubled by this revelation. Without thinking about it Ahsoka hugged him once more still trying to become used to the fact that she was now bigger than him by a full handspan. 

Obi-Wan was quicker to return the hug this time, but once Ahsoka had stepped back he looked at her puzzled. “What was that for?”

Ahsoka looked at him with a soft smile and tilted her head. “Comfort.”

Obi-Wan nodded slowly as if trying to understand a previously foreign concept. 

Finally, Ahsoka turned away and went back to the kitchenette to continue preparing the tea. She poured the hot water into the mugs, added the tea leaves and picked the mugs up, before gesturing for Obi-Wan to follow her to the small table. 

“Come on. Let’s sit down.”

They took a seat opposite each other and Ahsoka put Obi-Wan’s mug in front of him. He curled his fingers around it loosely, while staring into the steaming content, like he could find any answers in the green tea that Ahsoka had found in one of the counters and that smelled like some kind of citrus fruit. 

“Talk to me,” Ahsoka finally said and Obi-Wan looked up.

“About what?”

Ahsoka shrugged. “About whatever is on your mind.” 

Obi-Wan didn’t answer right away, but after several long moments, he started to speak, still looking into his tea. “I wish Qui-Gon was here.”

Ahsoka hesitated for a moment. Not that Obi-Wan would have noticed, but she took a few seconds to decide if she was supposed to give up one more secret. Master Yoda had possibly seen it in her memories, so it wasn’t a secret anymore. He hadn’t told Obi-Wan, but Ahsoka couldn’t think of a reason to keep it from him and she had already told the High Council so many things.

“Qui-Gon is not here anymore, but you will see him again.”

Obi-Wan nodded without looking up. “There is no death, there is the Force,” he recited the Code.

“Yes, but that’s not what I meant. Qui-Gon Jinn learned the secret of immortality and he found a way to reach a state of eternal consciousness instead of passing into the Force after dying. He just hasn’t found a way to interact with the physical world yet and it’s going to take him about ten more years to figure it out, but when he does, you will see him again.”

Obi-Wan just stared at Ahsoka, blinking several times. “How do you know that?” he finally asked.

Ahsoka smiled. “Because my Obi-Wan told me that he had talked to him. At first, he hadn’t been sure if it had been Qui-Gon or just an illusion, but years later I saw him as well.”

A smile appeared on Obi-Wan’s lips and after a moment the nodded. “Thank you. I know that it shouldn’t make a difference. I do trust in the Force but…”

“Somehow it does make a difference,” Ahsoka finished his sentence and Obi-Wan nodded again. 

Ahsoka knew what he meant. The knowledge that a loved one was still around and had not passed into the Force entirely made him seem not that far away. 

Obi-Wan raised the mug in his hands to his mouth. He looked deep in thoughts, but he took a moment to softly blow on the surface of the still-hot tea to not burn his lips. He did it again and then a third time, before taking a cautious sip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That Qui-Gon appeared to Ahsoka is purely fictional. By the time she left the Order, Anakin and Obi-Wan still thought that the Qui-Gon they had talked to on Mortis had been an illusion. Anakin says as much to Master Yoda in the Clone Wars episode “Voices” and Yoda never confirms that he has been talking to Qui-Gon as well. He only tells Obi-Wan at the end of Episode III, but Ahsoka couldn’t have heard about that, since she never talked to Obi-Wan or Yoda again after Order 66.


	6. Chapter 6

The door to Obi-Wan’s and Anakin’s living quarters was opened from the inside and a moment later Ahsoka got her first glimpse of young Anakin Skywalker. 

A big smile appeared on Ahsoka’s lips as she saw the boy, standing in front of her. She had once seen a holo picture of Anakin from the time shortly after he had become Obi-Wan’s Padawan, but in reality he was even cuter than Ahsoka remembered. The spikey Padawan haircut should look ridiculous, but somehow that made him even cuter. 

The boy looked up at Ahsoka with bright blue eyes, that widened in wonder as he saw the exotic alien standing in front of his door. He had most likely never seen a Togruta before and like a lot of children he seemed fascinated by her markings and her blue and white striped montrals and head tails. Even though Shili was part of the Republic and had been nearly since the beginning, most Togruta never left their home planet to venture to the stars and Shili itself had neither mineral resources nor plants or wildlife that was interesting to offworlders. 

After a few seconds, Anakin seemed to remember that he wasn’t supposed to stare at someone and he clasped his hands in front of his Jedi tunic and bowed.

“Good morning. My name is Anakin Skywalker.”

Ahsoka’s smile grew even wider as she looked at the boy in front of her and she had to press her lips together tightly so she wouldn’t start crying as her feelings threatened to overwhelm her. She remembered her Skyguy always towering over her with his ridiculously tall and lean frame. In comparisons Anakin was so small and with the little shielding Obi-Wan had probably taught him on the way back from Naboo, he shone in the Force like the light of a sun. Every senior Padawan, Knight and Master that had walked past Anakin in one of the Temple corridors during the last few days had to have noticed Anakin’s incredible presence in the Force as well. Ahsoka had always wondered why the Council and Obi-Wan hadn’t tried to keep the rumours of Anakin being the Chosen One a secret, but now she realized that this simply hadn’t been an option.

Anakin started to look at Ahsoka funny and she realized that she hadn’t said anything so far. She had just been staring at him like a crazy person and she tried to get a grip on herself.

“Hello Anakin,” she said. “My name is Ahsoka Tano. Knight Ahsoka Tano to be precise, but you can call me Ahsoka. Obi-Wan invited me over for breakfast.” 

It had been Ahsoka that had suggested to have breakfast this morning, but Anakin didn’t need to know that. 

“Please, come in. Master Obi-Wan already said that someone would join us for breakfast. He is just finishing the tea.” With that, Anakin stepped out of the way and Ahsoka entered the room. 

It was standard Master-Padawan quarters, but they looked very well lived in so Ahsoka assumed they had belonged to Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon. She had only met Qui-Gon Jinn as a Force Ghost once, but most of the items in the room felt like they had belonged to him. Ahsoka could see trinkets on the shelves that looked like they had come from many different worlds and on a rack on the wall she spotted a collection of actual paper books next to an array of small stones. 

Obi-Wan was just rounding the small kitchen counter with a teapot in his hands that he brought over to the table when Ahsoka had finished looking around. 

“Good morning, Ahsoka,” Obi-Wan greeted her. He looked better than yesterday, but there were still circles under his eyes that were a few shades darker than his skin tone. 

“Good morning Obi-Wan.”

“Sit down, please,” Anakin said and gestured to one of the four chairs at the table. 

Ahsoka sat down on one of the places where a plate, cup and utensils had been laid out, while Anakin climbed on the chair opposite of her. Obi-Wan sat down next to his Padawan, before filling all of their cups with a brown tea that smelled pleasantly spicey. 

Anakin meanwhile had not taken his eyes off Ahsoka. “Have you and my Master been friends for long?” he finally asked curiously.

Ahsoka chuckled softy. “Not that long, no. But it feels like we have known each other for years.”

“Ahsoka is here because we want to talk to you about something,” Obi-Wan said next.

The previously excited look on Anakin’s face became wary and Ahsoka smiled reassuringly. “It’s nothing bad, Anakin. Don’t worry. And you’re not in trouble either. The reason I’m here is that the Council decided that I will support Obi-Wan in your training and for the time being we will do most of that outside the Temple.”

Anakin looked at Ahsoka with big eyes and she could see that he was trying to think of a reason why the Council would decide that. Ahsoka thought it best to give him a reason, before he could draw his own conclusions and probably come up with the idea that this development was somehow his fault. Her Skyguy had always tended to do that. 

“The reason for this is that Obi-Wan has only just been knighted a few days ago. Normally a Knight doesn’t take on a Padawan until he has a few years to become comfortable in his new role and has gained experience in taking solo missions. Apart from that you did not have the training that the other Initiates usually have when they get chosen as Padawans. You have a lot of catching up to do and while I’m sure you will be a very quick student, neither the teaching Masters here at the Temple nor your Master on his own would be up for that. That’s why I’m here. I will train with Obi-Wan to further hone his abilities and at the same time I will train you so that between Obi-Wan and me we, will get you up to the level of the other Padawans in no time.”

Ahsoka gave Anakin a confident smile. The boy was meanwhile trying to make sense of all of this and knotted his eyebrows. 

“So I’ll be taught by two Masters?” he finally asked.

“Yes, but please don’t call me Master,” Ahsoka replied hastily. “Obi-Wan is your Master, I’ll be just there to help. Ahsoka will do fine.”

“For how long?” Anakin asked cautiously and Ahsoka could sense where this question was coming from. Anakin could probably feel a connection to her, just like Ahsoka felt a connection to him and after leaving his mother behind on Tatooine, the prospect of someone entering his life just to disappear again made him feel uneasy.

“We’ll see. Until you reach your knighthood probably or until you decide that you don’t need me anymore and would rather go on a mission alone with your Master.”

Anakin shook his head. “I don’t think that’s going to happen. I like you already.”

Ahsoka could feel Anakin’s affection through his rudimentary shields and she felt him latch onto her in the Force. He didn’t realise it, but the reason it was so easy for him to form a connection to Ahsoka was due to the training bond that Ahsoka had shared with her Skyguy. She could also feel the longing inside of Anakin to rely on someone after having been thrown in this strange new world and Ahsoka felt that declining the Council seat to train Anakin had been the right decision.

The ate breakfast while talking about all the things that Anakin would learn in the next few years until Ahsoka mentioned the planet Ilum where one of their first trips would go to. Ahsoka needed to construct two new lightsabers and on that occasion Anakin could already search for the crystal of his first lightsaber. Upon hearing that, Anakin got really excited and told Ahsoka that on Tatooine he had built a protocol droid from scratch that was now helping his mum in the house. Thinking about his mother though made Anakin emotional and he closed off, staring down on his already empty plate in front of him. Obi-Wan tried to pull Anakin’s thoughts away from his mother and with a look at the crono on the wall reminded Anakin that it was time for him to leave for his meditation lessons with Master Yoda. Anakin however frowned and shrank further into his seat.

Obi-Wan placed a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “Come on, Anakin. I know it’s difficult at the beginning, but you should not keep Master Yoda waiting.”

It had been decided that Master Yoda would teach Anakin how to build his shields and meditate for the time being, because Obi-Wan was still grieving for his master and his mind was too preoccupied at the moment to function as the calm anchor Anakin needed right now. On top of that, Master Yoda had a lot more experience with teaching a child how to meditate since he usually was the one teachings the younglings in the crèche.

Anakin nodded and climbed from his chair, but Ahsoka felt that there was more to it. There usually was with Anakin, she had learned that over the years.

“Anakin, wait,” she said, standing up as well. When she reached Anakin, she knelt down in front of him. “I can see that there is something troubling you. Please tell me what it is. I promise that I won’t be angry whatever it is and neither will Obi-Wan.”

Anakin hesitated for a moment, his lips pressed together and Ahsoka sent a wave of reassurance and acceptance in the Force around the boy. It took another long moment, but then Anakin answered, even though he didn’t look Ahsoka into the eyes.

“It’s just that I miss my mom so much right now and I don’t want Master Yoda picking up on it, because he is going to tell me again that I have to let go of my fear of never seeing her again, but I can’t. She’s my mum.”

Ahsoka put her hands on Anakin’s shoulders. “Anakin, look at me,” she said softly and after a moment the boy did. “It’s ok to miss your mum. Of course you miss her, she is your mother. Obi-Wan misses his Master as well.”

Anakin looked at her skeptically and Ahsoka knew that Obi-Wan had tried his best to be the perfect example of not being attached and not letting Anakin see what he was truly feeling. But in doing that, he had just given Anakin the impression that he himself was lacking and that it was wrong for a Jedi to miss another person, because surely if Obi-Wan didn’t miss his dead master, Anakin shouldn’t miss his mother, especially when she was just on another planet. Obi-Wan had tried to be strong for Anakin and set a good example, but Anakin didn’t need that. He needed to know that he wasn’t alone and that others were struggling just like he was. 

Ahsoka looked at Obi-Wan and she hoped that their conversation the night before had reassured him that showing his feelings and dealing with them was only human and would soon be recognized by the rest of the Jedi Order as well. 

Obi-Wan hesitated, then he took a deep breath and nodded. “Yes, I do miss Qui-Gon. I miss him terribly. He taught me everything I know and practically raised me since I had been thirteen years old.” A wistful smile appeared on Obi-Wan’s lips and he shook his head slightly. “I’ve slept on the couch the last few nights because I couldn’t bring myself to sleep in his bed. But even sleeping on the couch, I didn’t really get a lot of sleep.”

Anakin looked at Obi-Wan completely surprised as if he couldn’t believe what he had just heard. After a moment he shrugged sheepishly. “I haven’t been sleeping very well either. The bed is so big and it’s so soft.”

Obi-Wan laughed and looked at Anakin fondly. “You’ll get used to it. The downside is, that once that happens you will start missing the soft mattress in no time when we’re away on missions.”

Anakin tried not to grin but failed. Then his expression turned serious again. “I could sleep in your bed for the next few nights, Master. That way neither of us would have to be alone while we get used to the new situation.”

Ahsoka bit her lip so she wouldn’t grin like a lunatic. This offer was so typically Anakin. He always wanted to help others, even when he was not feeling all that well himself. 

Obi-Wan smiled. “I would like that Anakin.”

“You see Anakin, it’s perfectly normal to miss those we care about when they are no longer there,” Ahsoka said.

Anakin nodded but then he looked at Ahsoka with a guarded expression once more. “But Master Yoda said that I have to let go of my attachments because that wasn’t the way of the Jedi.”

Ahsoka’s heart nearly broke as she looked at Anakin. He wanted to be a Jedi so badly and he was trying his best, but not having grown up in the Temple he couldn’t understand why emotions and attachments could be something dangerous to a Jedi. Ahsoka just hoped that the Council would hold their promise of evaluating their current teachings and their interpretation of the Code and the Order, because if they didn’t, Ahsoka would have to club them over their collectives heads once again and this time she would use Master Yoda’s gimer stick.

“Everyone has attachments, Anakin,” Ahsoka said, looking at the boy. “We have friends, family, teachers and masters and we form attachments with all of them. We are all emotional beings. Attachments only become dangerous if a Jedi gets overwhelmed by his emotions. We are trained in the use of the Force and due to that training we become more powerful than most beings in this Galaxy. That’s why the Jedi try to be mindful of their emotions so that we won’t be overwhelmed by them. That is true for emotions like love and desire but also for emotions like anger and hate. A Jedi could try to use the Force to make another person love him against their will out of desire or become so angry over the loss of a loved one that he hurts others in trying to take revenge. Our strong connection to the Force and the powers we are granted to help the people of this Galaxy are a gift, but they are also a responsibility. We have to be aware of our strength and learn discipline and balance within ourselves so that we will never hurt others.”

Anakin thought about that for a long moment, before he nodded. “So it’s okay for me to miss my mom and for Obi-Wan to miss his Master as long as we don’t become angry at others because we are upset.”

Ahsoka smiled proudly and nodded. “Exactly. Very good, Anakin. And while we are talking about your mum, there is something else I’d like to tell you. I wanted to wait until we were sure that it worked, because we didn’t want to upset you if something goes wrong, but the Council has decided that yours is a special case because your mother is still a slave. They contacted Queen Amidala of Naboo and she agreed to help because you saved her planet. A couple of pilots that you flew with during the battle are on their way to Tatooine to buy your mother’s freedom and afterward she is going to get a job at the palace in Theed. You can talk to her via holo once she arrives on Naboo. And I promise you that within the next year there will be a mission that will bring us to Naboo, so you can visit your mother.”

Anakin looked at Ahsoka completely baffled, before a wide grin appeared on his face. A moment later he threw his arms around Ahsoka and hugged her. “Thank you! Thank you so much!”

Ahsoka returned the hug and once Anakin had let go of her she smiled widely. “You’re welcome Anakin. Fate dealt you and your mother terrible cards and the least the Jedi Order could do to honour the commitment you made to the Order is to make sure that your mother will no longer be a slave.”

“I will become the best Jedi ever and help all the people in the Galaxy that need helping,” Anakin proclaimed solemnly and Ahsoka laughed softly.

“I’m sure you will Anakin. And to do that, you should go to your lessons with Master Yoda now.”

Anakin nodded. “I’ll see you later then. Bye Ahsoka. Goodbye Master.”

“Goodbye Anakin,” Obi-Wan answered from his place at the table and with that Anakin went to the door and left the room.

Once the door had closed behind him, Ahsoka stood up again.

“You’re very good with him,” Obi-Wan said, while Ahsoka went back to the table. 

“Well, I was his Padawan for a little more than three years and he was never very good at keeping his opinions to himself, so I know him better than he knows himself probably. On top of that for all his brightness in the Force, he was terrible at shielding when he was exhausted or frustrated and considering that there was a war going on and we were mostly fighting on the front lines, he was pretty much always exhausted or frustrated. Apart from that, I’ve always been very good with kids. I think it’s because of the stripes.” 

Ahsoka glanced at her montrals, before sitting down on her chair again and Obi-Wan laughed. 

“Yeah probably. Maybe they have a hypnotizing effect on children.”

Ahsoka grinned. “Yeah maybe.”

They looked at each other for a few moments, the mood light and easy, before Obi-Wan’s expression turned sombre again and his brows furrowed. 

“Maybe you should be his Master instead of me,” he said quietly.

Ahsoka shook her head firmly. “No, Obi-Wan. You are Anakin’s Master and that’s the way it is supposed to be. You may not realize it yet, but the two of you have a special connection and your Master-Padawan bond is going to be one of the strongest the Order has ever seen.”

Obi-Wan sighed. “It’s just that right now I feel completely out of my depths with him. You understand him so much better than I do.”

“You have known him for just a few days and before that, you have never spent much time with a slave. For all the Jedi taught you about different species and creatures, you have no reference to understand what’s going on inside of Anakin’s head. He was a slave for all his life and being free now doesn’t change the fact that all he has ever learned was how to survive as a slave. Now he has to learn how to be a free person and believe me, there is a vast difference between those behavioral patterns.”

Obi-Wan looked at Ahsoka for a long moment, before shaking his head in disbelief. “How did I deal with that the last time then?”

“Through trial and error,” Ahsoka answered grimacing. “And quite a bit of heartache along the way. But you did it and Anakin became a great Jedi and the best Master I could ever have hoped for. And this time I’m here and I will do the best I can to help both of you avoid the bumps along the road. So let’s start right away.” Ahsoka smiled broadly, pushed her plate out of the way and folded her hands in front of her on the table. “Anakin Skywalker one-o-one.”

Obi-Wan raised a skeptical eyebrow, but then he shrugged and looked at her attentively.

Ahsoka nodded contently. “Alright, first of all, Anakin Skywalker was a slave.” 

That statement produced a raised eyebrow from Obi-Wan once again. “I know that already.”

“Yes,” Ahsoka answered patiently. “But as I said before, you have no idea what it truly means for a person to grow up in slavery. After the Republic had fallen in my time I was hiding in the Outer Rim and I lived on planets where slavery was common practice. One day I met a man who was freeing slaves and teaching them how to make a life on their own and especially those who were still young and had been slaves all their lives had a hard time learning how to function in a normal society.” 

“Is that the reason why we won’t be spending a lot of time at the Temple and why Anakin won’t learn the basic Jedi teachings in groups with the other Initiates and Padawans?” Obi-Wan asked curiously.

Ahsoka nodded. “Yes, that’s exactly the reason. Neither the Initiates that were raised at the Temple nor the Knights and Masters teaching them know how to deal with Anakin and just treating him like any other Initiate is a recipe for disaster. Apart from that children are cruel, even those raised at the Temple. And as long as Anakin isn’t able to fit in, he is not going to find friends here. In the eyes of the Initiates, he is stupid and untrained, but he already has a Master and they don’t. Imagine how that will go down, especially since in half a year Anakin is going to beat every one of them in saber practice. Give it a year or two, then we can go on missions with other Master-Padawan teams and see if Anakin will make friends with some of them.”

Obi-Wan contemplated what Ahsoka had just said and she gave him a few moments before continuing. “So, back to what we were talking about. Anakin Skywalker was a slave. That means that he had no control over his life. A slave owns nothing, not even his own life belongs to him.”

“A Jedi’s life belongs to the Order and we don’t have any possessions either,” Obi-Wan said, but Ahsoka shook her head vehemently.

“There is a vast difference, believe me. A Jedi can choose to leave the Order. A slave is the legal property of his master and as such he lives with the knowledge and constant fear that his master can do anything he wants to him. That means he can beat him or starve him for no other reason than to enjoy the slave’s suffering. He can even kill the slave out of a whim or out of an accident and neither the law nor any kind of moral code is going to stop him because in the eyes of a society where slavery is legal, no one would bat an eye. Such things just happen. Every freeman has the right to beat a slave if he wants to and the only thing that’s stopping anyone from randomly mistreating slaves is the protection of the slave’s master. But if a freeman claims a slave was rude to him, every master will allow the slave to be beaten or even killed if the transgression was severe enough. The master can just buy a new slave after all, which is expensive but ultimately better than soiling one’s reputation.”

Obi-Wan frowned. “But as far as I know that never happened to Anakin. Qui-Gon described Watto as a halfway decent being.”

Ahsoka nodded. “You’re right. Anakin and his mother were lucky, but just because it didn’t happen to Anakin, he was nonetheless aware that it could have happened and he saw it happen to others. Besides, Watto was a gambler. He won Anakin and his mother in a bet and there was always the possibility that he could have lost them in the next bet. They had no control over that and no matter how valuable they proved to be for Watto, there was no guarantee that he would keep them. One day Anakin’s mother could just have been gone, sold, lost in a bet, beaten to death, whatever. Imagine constantly living with the fear of something like that happening and no matter what you do, you can’t prevent it from happening, because you are entirely dependant on the person that owns you that day.”

Obi-Wan stared at the table in from of him without answering. After a while, he shook his head. “How can anyone live like that?”

Ahsoka shrugged. “You have to. Or you kill yourself if you can manage it before your master can stop you.” She paused for a moment, but Obi-Wan didn’t say anything and she finally continued. “For Anakin that means, even though he technically knows that he’s free now, the Jedi Order and everything the Jedi stand for is too vast a concept to comprehend for Anakin at the moment. He will only see the similarities between his old life as a slave and his new life as a Padawan until he is old enough to start understanding the difference. For the time being, he will latch onto you, more than any Padawan ever would, because for him you are not only his teacher, you are his whole world and the one person that is keeping him safe. That means you will have to be very careful how you act around him and whatever you do, you can’t try keeping your distance like a Master would do with a new Padawan. Anakin simply won’t understand why you’re doing it, but rather view it as a rejection and that would unhinge and confuse him.”

Obi-Wan nodded thoughtfully and Ahsoka gave him a moment to come to terms with what she had just told him. She assumed that he was starting to actually realize that Anakin was something special and not only because of his strength in the Force. 

Finally, Ahsoka moved on to the next point. “Alright, second. Anakin Skywalker was a slave.”

Obi-Wan lifted his head and looked at her with a puzzled expression on his face. “You already said that.”

“Yes, I did,” Ahsoka answered. “But there’s more to it. We already established that Watto didn’t mindlessly beat Anakin for his transgressions even though he could have. He probably beat him on occasion anyway, but most of the time when Anakin said something rude, broke something by accident or was just standing in the wrong place at the wrong time he was insulted or yelled at which was pretty good considering the alternative. What you need to understand is, that as a result of that Anakin is used to being scolded for things he did wrong, just like for things that were not his fault whatsoever. There was nothing he could do either way, because saying that it had not been his fault would only have gotten him a beating after all, just like promising to be more careful in the future. No master wants a slave to talk back to them when he’s angry. That means for Anakin a scolding was something to be endured, silently, especially when you knew your master would most likely not do anything worse to you, like beating you, selling you or killing you. So all you had to do was wait until it was over. Do you understand what that kind of learned behaviour means for your interaction with Anakin?”

Obi-Wan looked at Ahsoka a contemplative look on his face before he nodded slowly. “It means that if I were to chide him for a mistake, he would probably not listen to me at all, but endure it silently with his eyes on the floor while being angry and not understanding what his mistake had been in the first place. At the same time, he would probably wonder if he was ever going to screw up big enough for me to hit him or send him away. He will probably be testing me with more severe transgression to find out how much it would take for me to do something more drastic.” Obi-Wan gulped, looking utterly horrified at what he had just lined out.

Ahsoka extended one hand and gripped his arm, softly squeezing for a moment. “Hey. It’s not that bad. You just have to come up with a different approach to point out mistakes to Anakin to get him to improve. You just can’t treat him like one of the Younglings or the Initiates here at the Temple. Learning from his mistakes is not a concept Anakin is familiar with. For him failing isn’t a possible chance, it’s dangerous and has to be avoided at all costs.”

Ahsoka gave Obi-Wan a moment to wrap his head around that, before she pulled her hand back and took a deep breath. “Next one. Anakin Skywalker was a slave.”

Obi-Wan winced and closed his eyes for a moment, before looking at Ahsoka again. “I’m starting to dread where this is going.”

Ahsoka ignored him and continued with her explanation. “We’ve established that as a slave you can get yelled at or beaten for virtually anything, so your best chance of avoiding that is to be quiet and unobtrusive. And if that’s not an option because someone is expecting an answer from you or wants you to do something, you try to be as polite and demure as possible.”

Obi-Wan stared at her in shock. “That means every time Anakin politely stepped out of the way to let someone pass or stood by the wall because he didn’t want to get in the way, he was doing it to avoid getting hit or yelled at?”

Ahsoka nodded. “Yes. But you mustn’t take that personally,” she added softly. “Anakin doesn’t know you or anyone else here at the Temple and you are a grown-up. He doesn’t know what to expect from any of you or me for that matter, so he plays it safe. The moment he starts talking back or being rude or disobeying you on purpose, he will be trying to figure out if you are someone safe or if you were just tricking him. Only when he starts acting around you like a child would with his friends he will finally trust you enough to let his guard down and be himself. You can’t demand the respect a Padawan would normally grant his Master because respect out of politeness or deference to your title as a Jedi Master isn’t a concept Anakin understands. In his world, there have only been three types of people: his friends, his mother and fellow adult slaves that shared the same fate as he did and the masters that owned them. As far as I see it you have two options: you can either become his friend, which would make training him slightly difficult or you can become a fellow adult slave. And that’s where I come into play. In training both you and Anakin, you will become something of a brother Padawan to him. A friend, because you share the same fate, namely being run ragged and scolded by me, but an adult to be treated with respect.” Ahsoka smiled sweetly. “By seeing you interact with me and realizing that the Knights and Masters of the Order are a very different kind of masters than he has known so far, I hope that once we return to Coruscant, Anakin will be able to function within the Order and learn from the other Masters as well.”

Obi-Wan nodded slowly after Ahsoka had outlined the role he would be playing in Anakin’s life. Finally, he looked at her curiously. “You have given this a lot of thought.”

Ahsoka shrugged. “Well, yes. The Force has sent me back in time to help the Chosen One so the last two days I’ve spent every waking hour figuring out how to help you and Anakin the best I can.”

Obi-Wan nodded again and looked at her with a new determination. “Alright, what else?”

Ahsoka allowed herself a wry grin. “Well apart from the fact that he is going to be just like any other teenage boy soon enough, Anakin has a big heart and kind soul, always blames himself far worse than anyone else ever could and is loyal to a fault. He is always in motion, hates standing still, is a very quick study and has a tendency to be incredibly reckless, when lives are at stake. At the same time he has quite the temper, but it tends to burn hot and cool down quickly. He is a terrible wise-ass, much more powerful than any other Jedi you have ever encountered and leaves his socks lying everywhere instead of putting them into the laundry chute because he likes the feeling of the cool and smooth floor under his bare feet. He saved my life more times than I can count and he was my best friend.” Ahsoka felt her eyes become wet at thinking about her Skyguy and what had become of him in the end. She forced herself however to think of him as her incredible Master and not as the monster that he had turned into. 

Obi-Wan meanwhile looked her with a soft smile on his lips. He seemed to understand that even though Anakin was right here, the man she remembered as Anakin Skywalker was gone. But he could also see that Ahsoka had grieved for her Master and had made peace with what had happened as best as she could and even though it still hurt, it was bearable. This time it was Obi-Wan that extended a hand and put it on top of Ahsoka’s fingers as a gesture of comfort. He wasn’t the Obi-Wan Ahsoka remembered, but they would help each other and they would both help Anakin and she hoped that it would be enough.


	7. Chapter 7

Ahsoka had never known Anakin’s mother for she had already been dead by the time Ahsoka had become Anakin’s Padawan and Anakin had never talked about her. But even looking at the shimmering blue image of the holoprojector, Ahsoka thought that Shmi Skywalker was a wonderful person, kind and caring. 

Shmi smiled at Anakin who was standing in front of the holotable in his and Obi-Wan’s quarters and the crow feet around Shmi’s eyes suggested that she was someone who smiled a lot. Ahsoka found that quite remarkable because Shmi Skywalker had been a slave all her life until three days ago when two of Queen Amidala’s pilots had bought Anakin’s mother from her owner Watto. Now she was safe on Naboo where she would get work at the palace.

“I’m so proud of you Ani. And you look all grown up in your new robes. Please promise me that you will listen to your teachers.”

Anakin nodded solemnly. “I will, mum. I promise. I will be the best student ever and I will become a great Jedi.”

Shmi’s smile broadened and Ahsoka could see that it was hard for her to see her little boy so far away on a distant planet.

“I know you will Ani. Take good care of yourself and when you come to Naboo you can tell me all about the adventures I’m sure you will be having until then. And whatever you do, don’t forget that I love you Ani, so very much.”

Shmi smiled again and Anakin nodded, trying to be brave even though tears were shimmering in his eyes. 

“I love you too mum.”

Then the connection ended and the holoimage of Shmi vanished. Anakin continued looking at the holoprojector for another moment, then he turned to Ahsoka, who was sitting on one of the meditation cushions in front of the big window next to Obi-Wan. The boy made his way over to them, climbed onto Ahsoka’s cushion and hugged her tightly.

“Thank you,” he said softly and Ahsoka slung her arms around the boy.

“Of course Anakin. You deserve to know that your mother is safe. Nothing in life is certain and the Force will decide when it’s time for us to leave this world behind, but slavery is a cruel fate that no one should have to endure.”

Anakin let go of Ahsoka after a moment and then went to Obi-Wan to hug him as well. Obi-Wan hesitated for a second, before returning the hug. 

“Thank you Master.”

“You’re welcome Anakin,” Obi-Wan answered after Anakin had sat back on the meditation cushion. “I was raised at the Temple, like most of the Jedi and I didn’t know my parents, so I don’t have anyone I had to leave behind. I know it’s not easy to live your own life from now on, but always remember that your mother is supporting the way you have chosen and you can make her proud by being strong and helping others throughout the Galaxy as is the duty of the Jedi.”

Anakin nodded and looked at Obi-Wan with a serious expression. “I will Master. I promise.”

Obi-Wan smiled fondly and put a hand on Anakin’s shoulder. “I know that Anakin. And now off to bed with you. We will leave for Illum tomorrow quite early.”

Ahsoka felt excitement radiating from Anakin as he nodded. “Yes Master, goodnight. Goodnight Ahsoka.”

Ahsoka smiled and bid Anakin a good night as well before the boy went off to his room. Once the door had closed behind him, Ahsoka looked at Obi-Wan appreciatingly. 

“You’re getting quite good at understanding and supporting Anakin.”

Obi-Wan looked at her skeptically though. “Really? I still feel pretty far out of my depth.”

“Of course you do,” Ahsoka replied. “Just a week ago you have been a Padawan yourself and taking care of a child is never easy. But you will do just fine, and I’m here to help you. And if you ever make a mistake, which I’m sure is going to happen, I will just wait until our next visit to Coruscant, ask Master Yoda if I can borrow his gimer stick and clonk you over that head with it.”

Obi-Wan tilted his head and looked at Ahsoka with a deadpan expression. “That makes me feel a lot better.” 

Ahsoka ignored the sarcasm and smiled. A moment later she felt a wave of cautious contentment and careful hope from Obi-Wan and she knew that she was right where she was supposed to be.

End


End file.
